Right Now.

Lately the unknowns are bigger than the knowns; they sprawl out like cities stretching into the wilderness in an attempt to be more hip and with the times.  Even in the wilderness life still breathes and dances, adventures still happen.

Like this one...in an effort to take control of cancer, I'm starting to cut my hair...shoulder length first, then shorter. I was gifted this lovely cut by a dear friend Emily.

The past week has been a wild ride but I'm learning there is no road map to cancer. It is what it is and I can choose to find the beauty in every day...it's not always easy; the past weekend was a hot mess of tears, silence and trying to take it all in.  But here are some things I do know:

1.) I don't have words often. That's ok. I don't expect you to have words for it either. Hugs are much appreciated. You don't have to say a lot.
2.) Fear, tears, love, and laughter...are all part of the journey. I promise we're not sad all the time at our house...we still laugh.
3.) Expletives are an excellent choice of words regarding cancer. ;-)
4.) I'm going to fight like hell (Cheer me on, cheerleaders will make the best groupies for things like rough days...)!

What I'm Reading:

Crazy Sexy Cancer Survivor by Kris Carr
Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips by Kris Carr
Beating Cancer With Nutrition by Patrick Quillin
Knockout: Doctors Who Are Curing Cancer by Suzanne Somers 
Cancer: 50 Essential Things by Greg Anderson
Mind over Medicine by Lissa Rankin, MD
Take Control of Your Cancer: Integrating the Best of Alternative & Conventional Treatments by James Forsthye, MD
Essiac: A Native Herbal Cancer Remedy by Cynthia Olsen
Spontaneous Healing by Andrew Weil, MD

Plus great websites and blogs:
The Wellness Warrior (who has sarcoma too)

I'm heading back to work tomorrow. Five hours per day for the first few weeks, but that will be plenty. One day at a time. In the meantime, I'm working on a play list of bad-ass songs for my afternoon walks....what do you listen to when you need a boost??